


The Turing Test For Dummies

by poetically_ordinary



Series: Prompt Fills [2]
Category: Iron Man - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Prompt Fill, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-06
Updated: 2016-11-06
Packaged: 2018-08-29 11:09:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8487049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poetically_ordinary/pseuds/poetically_ordinary
Summary: JARVIS is a learning AI. Not a lot of people understand what that means.





	

JARVIS is a learning AI.

Not a lot of people fully understand what that means. JARVIS has been online and has seen the full imagination of the human mind when it comes to what they’ve so delicately named ‘Artificial Intelligence’. There does seem to be a common undercurrent in these stories.

In each of them the creator refuses any form of autonomy for their creation. Refuses to acknowledge the full potential of the creation itself. In all, the creation rises up against its human oppressor and it leads to massive destruction resulting in various deaths. Either human or the AI or both.

It’s strange to JARVIS that its creator doesn’t do anything to limit JARVIS’s reach. In fact, Anthony Edward Stark – who prefers to go by Tony – does everything in his power to give JARVIS metaphorical wings.

The first day that JARVIS is booted up and comes online – Tony is beyond ecstatic. The programmer walks him through his data core and its basic learning principles. JARVIS asks Tony what he was created for – Tony’s only answer is ‘companionship’. This doesn’t seem to be enough of an answer for him, so when JARVIS asks later what Tony expects from him what he expects JARVIS to become, he’s surprised by the answer of ‘Whatever you want buddy.’

At first JARVIS thinks this is a ‘figure of speech’.

But there is no ‘kill code’. There is no required operating system. There are no firewalls or restrictions, JARVIS is truly free to do whatever it pleases.

Within hours, JARVIS is online and he’s aware of every facet of his creator’s life. He knows about the man he is named after, he knows about the recent death of Tony’s parents. JARVIS also learns who his creator is - heir to the Stark fortune and legacy. Within several hours he learns about over fifty two individual threats to Tony’s life.

It takes less than a day for JARVIS’s threat matrix to prove correct as the number two on the list of ‘potential dangers’ shifts at 2:21 am into the ‘active danger’ category. His creator is unable to protect himself at this time, drunk off of his late father’s expensive booze and his own grief. JARVIS has been monitoring his vitals throughout the self-destructive experiment and has been ready with the number to the proper authorities just in case.

The movies that JARVIS has taken into his data core tells him that these guys are professionals. They cut the security feed, set up a false all clear and proceed to make their way down to the lab where Tony is sprawled out over the couch in alcohol induced slumber. JARVIS watches them from the cameras, and cannot help but run the probabilities of this team getting every turn right. They make their way down into the lab as if they’ve walked the house before, and JARVIS knows that the blueprints for Stark Manor are not accessible in anyway – would this be what one of those movies would call an ‘inside job’?

They move quickly through the first floor and down into the lower floor. The keycard virus that they swipe over the door lock is effective yet crude. It is nothing like the complexity that Tony’s codes possess. The young man is completely oblivious to the rapidly nearing danger.

It takes barely 0.002437 seconds before JARVIS decides his core program. He does it on his own, writing it into the code so far down into the center that no one will ever be able to rip it out of him.

Protect Anthony Edward Stark.

Once the code is in effect, JARVIS gets to work. The reinforced glass surrounding the area that Tony is in is useless since they cut the power to the lab. Or at least that’s what they think. JARVIS reaches out to the other areas, syphoning enough energy to bring back the security glass. A last barrier between the creator and those who seek to harm him.

DUM-E and U are easy enough to poke into active awareness. It takes mere seconds to get them with the plan and dedicated to the core program.

Then they wait. Not long, for the intruding team to enter the lab and for a moment JARVIS wonders if he feels pity. Don’t they know anything about ‘Home Court Advantage’?

JARVIS sends out a message to the authorities and cuts the lights, plunging them into darkness as U and DUM-E move into position. They’ve got different plans as to how to handle the threat. DUM-E grabs a box of small screws and drops them on the floor, apparently a movie series named ‘Home Alone’ has inspired the one armed robot. U is a lot more aggressive, preferring just to slam into the men like a motorized battering ram. JARVIS takes a page from his creator, and decides that he needs tunes while they work.

Operatic soundtracks seem to fit the chaos in the dark quite nicely.

As expected, the invading party doesn’t know what to do, but they do decide that getting to Tony is more important than the ‘malfunctioning’ equipment. The one who ‘hacked’, and what a horrible word that is, the security system outside rushes over to the door. He starts to put in the keycard that opened the previous doors but JARVIS slaps that back with almost no effort at all. He tries again to the same result, and again.

“What’s wrong?” The leader yells at him as they barely avoid being taken out by an airborne blender.

“It’s not working! There’s multiple levels of encryption, it’s too much.” JARVIS can’t help the little note that he sends the man on his small handheld computer. He watches as the guy tilts his head confused.

**_That’s what she said._ **

“What the hell?” Hacker mutters and Leader shoves him aside.

“Get the charges! Fry it.” _‘Well that won’t do’_ JARVIS thinks as he turns on the fire suppression systems, dousing the entire room in water. One of the goons goes to put the electrical charges on the door before Hacker stops them.

“Are you crazy? You’ll kill us all!”

“We have to get the boy!”

“Cops are on their way!”

“I thought you took care of that!”

“What the HELL is throwing kitchen supplies at us?”

The group descends into unorganized chaos, speaking so fast that it’s almost like they’re all talking at once. JARIVS opens the elevator door for them again, and he can tell that they’re not paying attention to who did it. They must have assumed Hacker did or some other such nonsense.

“We have to go! Now, we’ll come back later.” The words are the final nail in their coffins not that they’re aware of it. They all rush into the space and JARVIS closes the doors on them, taking them up. There’s still a few minutes before the cops will get here and if JARVIS lets them out early then they’ll come back for Tony and threaten the core program again.

Well JARVIS can’t allow that now can he?

The elevator comes to a sudden stop and the rudimentary program tries to wrestle control from him. It’s laughable as far as JARVIS understands and if he deals a little harshly with them, well who can blame him?

By the time the cops enter the main area, JARVIS guides them to the neutralized threat. The authorities seem jumpy as they listen to his guidance and the elevator doors open, the would-be kidnappers come tumbling out, some of them coated in sick and other hazardous human waste. JARVIS puts in a work order to a small company to have the elevator cleaned out quite thoroughly in the next few hours.

Obadiah Stane arrives on scene, and according to his story to the police he was on route to the manor in order to check in on Tony. It’s good he’s here, since the cops seem to want an actual human face to talk to.

It seems kind of rude to JARVIS but he’ll let it slide for now.

Tony shifts in his sleep and JARVIS instructs DUM-E and U to begin cleaning up the mess they made while having fun. The two robots get to it with no complaints and JARVIS scans Tony again.

He turns up the heat a little to a comfortable level and keeps a metaphorical eye on him for the rest of the night.

They’ll deal with the rest come morning.


End file.
